The holidays can be depressing if you are single. I’ve been there. If you have ever screamed at a kissing couple in line at Target on Black Friday to get a room, then you know what I’m talking about. December can be a bitter bitch for a single girl. I know that some of you would prefer to hibernate all winter and not think about another man until bikini season. You don’t need to be in a serious relationship to get through the holidays. A few first dates and a one night stand thrown in here and there and you’re good through Valentines Day! Here are a few reasons why you should get your ass out there and some tips on how to do it:
1. The Parties
No one wants to go to a Christmas party alone. Even worse…..leaving alone. I don’t care if its a tacky Christmas sweater party and you moms old turtleneck with the battery operated light up Christmas tree would win you first place. Show some fucking cleavage! Don’t worry about going to that party solo. Make a head turning entrance, be confident and work the room and you’ll have the guys lined up to be your designated driver home!
2. It’s Cold
Nothing is better than having a big strong man to wrap you up in his arms and cuddle with you on a cold night. Next time you hit the bar, leave your jacket at home and casually mention to the hottie you have been chatting up all night that you hate to walk home since its soooo cold. If he’s into you he’ll offer you his coat and an escort home. Thank him by warming him up at your place.
Nothing says I love you like a heartfelt gift from your man on Christmas morning. Unfortunately, most men have no clue and buy gifts like a horrible scarf or something insulting like a gym membership. They should just wise up and let us do the work. If he can’t do it right, then give us a damn gift card and we’ll do it ourselves! No man this year? No worries! The great thing about being single during the holidays is that you have one less person to buy a gift for but have tons of guys vying to be on your arm New Years Eve. Let them woo you all month long and take your pick!
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Be confident and sexy. I promise Santa will bring you something good. Even if you are on the naughty list.
The holidays are upon us and I thought I would dole out some love advice to help you navigate the season. If you can’t stand the one you’re with then you better kick them to the curb now before Christmas comes. My rule of thumb is to break up before thanksgiving. I had a guy break up with me on thanksgiving and give me a whole hell of alot to be thankful for. Like not having to buy him a Christmas present. If you break up with someone or get dumped during the holidays then I hope you saved the receipt. Or you can do the whole awkward, I wish I wasn’t here but since I spent the money we may as well do the gift exchange. But be careful, because the gift you chose in October to express your love may seem like a slap in the face in December. You might want to give that gift certificate for a couples massage to someone else. If someone dumped me and still gave me the ab roller I asked for I would shove it up their ass. “You really broke up with because you think I’m fat!” So, if you have not dropped off your unwanted romantic baggage by now, then you may have to stick it out til after valentines day. No one wants to be the heartless asshole that broke up with someone during the holidays. But, no one wants to deal with the ex that won’t accept that they are an ex and ruin your holiday plans by getting drunk and showing up at your office Christmas party. If you missed the deadline you can still look on the bright side. You’ll definitely have a date for new years eve.
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